Anam Cara event: How to start and facilitate your own men's group
Hey,
This is a message for the men. Sorry ladies.
Men, I'd like to invite you to an event I'm putting on December 7th-10th on our land outside of Austin, TX to learn how to create and lead your own men's group. We will explore transformational leadership and group facilitation which can be applied to many areas of life, but the focus will be on creating and leading your own men’s group.
If that doesn't sound interesting, just archive this and enjoy your Friday.
If you already know you're in, skip to the end for logistics.
Why I'm hosting this event
Several years ago I watched my friend Baya Voce's TED talk on The Cure to Loneliness. Spoiler alert - the answer is ritual. Rituals that bring us together with people we care about. A ritual is an action or set of actions done regularly.
Personally I've never struggled making new friends. However, before moving to Austin I had been nomadic for a few years, and outside of my relationship with Adee I felt really lonely. I wasn't spending enough time in one place to build the sort of deep relationships I was craving and needed. Even after making a handful of friends, I still felt a hole inside of me.
I had no rituals.
Then I met Zach Obront. A year later Zach invited me to be a part of his men's group that met weekly. That group and then another one I co-created later became some of the most important parts of my life.
The intention of both groups is essentially to commit to each other by hanging out weekly. I've been challenged emotionally and intellectually by these men. I've been supported through my hardest moments. And I’ve had a ridiculous amount of fun.
They’ve led to me being able to genuinely rate my friendship and community bucket a 10/10.
I'm hosting this event because on every Soul Searching trip I go on, nearly every person has the same issue. They LOVE the level and depth of conversation they had with the other guys on the trip, but they don't have anything like it back home. Furthermore, because they don't have a supportive environment full of like-minded men to challenge, inspire and hold them accountable, holding on to the insights they got and new behaviors they chose on the trip is hard to stick to.
Even when people have close friends, they tend to be isolated relationships rather than a community.
If you’re nodding your head at any of this thinking “yes, that’s me”, I’d love to help you.
The first step to creating your own men's group is to find the people. This is the most important step because you will be influenced by these men a lot by spending so much time with them.
Next, you need to know how to kick the group off and facilitate each session so the group doesn't default to joking and talking about sports and work. You need to learn to "hold space" for people and to give better feedback. To learn techniques for helping others explore their own experience rather than just giving advice. You need tools, exercises and questions that promote depth and clarity.
These are the two main topics we will explore together at this event:
How to attract the right men to join your group
How to facilitate and lead in a way that brings enormous value to the group every session, while having a shitload of fun
I’ll give you every frame I have around this topic, as many leadership and facilitation skills as I can pack into a 3.5 day experience, and loads of tactical tools and strategies.
The best way to learn to lead in this way is to do your own work. So there will be many opportunities for you to look within and explore:
how you show up
what your gifts are
what's holding you back from greater connection
how can you make it easier to get close to you
and how can you stand firmer for the greatness of those around you
The Celtic tradition has a term I love - Anam Cara, or Soul Friend. The late poet John O'Donahue says that everyone needs an Anam Cara. I say that we need a community of them.
Price
I want to make this experience a no-brainer for you and get a bit of a larger group. So I'm setting the price much lower than what I typically charge for this sort of thing.
$750 if you've been on a Soul Searching Adventure with me already
$1000 for everyone else
This gets your ticket to the event and a piece of land to put your tent on.
You're responsible for
All of your own gear
Food
Travel
If you’re IN or have questions, just reply to this email. I also highly encourage you to invite men you already know with whom you’d like to start your group. What a powerful way to kick your group off or improve an already existing one.
Sincerely,
Michael